Dating Advice for GLBT Identifying Teens
If you’re like a lot of gay teens (not to mention the hetero ones), you might feel overwhelmed by the thought of dating. Dating is tough for anyone, but it can be especially overwhelming as a teenager, let alone being a gay teen. However, dating can be an extremely rewarding experience, so taking the dive is worth it.
A Personal Gay Teen Dating Experience
Many gay teens think they’re alone when it comes to relationships and dating, but they are far from it. Learning how to talk to your crush or meet someone new can be daunting, but everyone experiences those moments of fear and apprehension.
As one teen writes,
“I have no history with gay teen dating, romance, or relationships of any kind. So, of course, I want to change that, but I don’t really know how to get to know a guy, how to start or continue a conversation, or anything else like that. There’s one guy in particular who my friends have been trying to hook me up with, but, thanks to my lack of experience with proper communication, it all ended up a failure. I just want to know how I can change this about myself so I don’t end up alone forever. I don’t know anyone with the same interests as me, so it’s pretty tough.”
Lucky for him and other gay teens in this position, there is hope.
It’s not shocking that the people we have crushes on are those we see the most often. In fact, it’s very common for teens to have crushes on their friends. When it comes to dating as a gay teen, you can always take matters into your own hands and let your friend know how you feel. However, coming out to your friend and revealing your crush may yield results that you’re not looking for. Be prepared by mapping out all the types of scenarios that could happen so that nothing takes you by surprise.
Sometimes, it seems like no one will ever have a crush on you. However, the feeling of having no one who likes you usually has to do with the signals you send out and the messages you’re giving. While coming on too strong can be a turn-off, so can being too shy. It’s important to find a balance between being forward and remaining who you are. Plus, this will help you navigate gay teen dating a whole lot easier.
There was a time when dating online was seen as a little weird, or even pathetic. Thankfully, the stigma of online dating is pretty much a thing of the past, and now plenty of people do much of their dating over the Internet. In fact, people of all genders and sexual orientations use online dating apps and websites to meet new people.
Although dating online is more common these days, there are some safety issues to consider. For instance, you’ll want to keep personal information to yourself, like your real name, address, and birthdate. However, you do want to be real when it comes to your personality and what you’re looking for.
Getting a boyfriend can seem like a daunting task as a gay teen, but it is possible. Some steps you can take involving coming out, going for guys who are also out, or approaching someone who might like you back. By putting yourself out there, you’ll have more opportunities to meet someone that you can establish a relationship with. Simply understand that this is a part of dating, and most guys won’t be your boyfriend overnight. Allow a real relationship to form over time by learning more about each other through messaging and shared experiences.
Feeling like you’re the only gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender teen can feel awful. Most teens like to have a community that we can feel a part of, and gay teens are no different. However, finding other gay teens can be tough. Thankfully, whether you are hoping to meet friends, or are interested in dating someone new, it’s very likely that someone else is in the same boat as you.
To get started, join some GLBT groups so you can build your community. You can also find friends in your area through youth websites, programs, and community centers.
Whether you want to know if someone winked or blinked at you, understanding the lines between flirting and being friendly can be challenging. Sometimes there are clear signs that someone is interested in you, and other times there can be mixed or absent signals. Because there are fewer “rules” for same-sex relationships than there are for opposite-sex relationships, figuring out what’s going on can be incredibly confusing.
To see if someone is into you, trust your gut. Then, look for signs like long eye contact, finding themselves wanting to get physically close to you, and remembering all the things you say.